article image

“It was important that we had a similar background” – Becoming a Single Mother by Choice with Help from a Sperm Donor

When Lindsay embarked on her fertility journey, she turned to London Women’s Clinic and London Sperm Bank to help grow her family

Ova Blogs

Share this article

linkedin icon twitter icon facebook icon email icon

“When I made the decision to start my family, I was making the decision alone. As a single woman, I had decided that I didn’t want to wait any longer for a partner or someone to enter my life before I could start my family – and with all of the options available these days for single women who are looking to become mothers, I was confident that this was the right decision for me.

I first spoke about the idea of using a sperm donor to my friends and family, and they were all incredibly supportive of this. In fact, my one friend who had also undergone fertility treatment services recommended a clinic to me, and whilst I had a few appointments with them, I decided to shop around a little bit to find a fertility clinic that would be the right fit for me, which is when I came across an open day for London Women’s Clinic!

It was great being able to visit the clinic in person for an open day, and see the people who would be helping me along my journey. The event was so informative, and described how using a sperm donor was possible in a way that was really easy to understand. The friendliness of the staff and the information I was given helped me decide that this was the clinic for me.

article image
Lindsay's daughter, Lexi

Before starting treatment, I was aware that I had some fibroids that would need to be taken out. This was a bit of a hiccup for my treatment as I was really eager to start as soon as possible and it felt like a bit of a stumbling block. When you’re going down the route of becoming a single mother by choice, there will be moments where you doubt yourself and question if this is best for you. Particularly when I underwent three rounds of IUI treatment, all of which were unsuccessful. You can start to lose hope a bit, and it can be emotionally draining at times.

Thankfully, Dr Booker suggested that I try a round of IVF to see if that would work. I’m so grateful that he was so optimistic about my chances, because 9 months later – my daughter was born!

The journey can be difficult at times, but when you think about what you might achieve at the end of it, it’s so worth it. I’m so grateful that I was able to find a donor that met what I was looking for and allowed me to become a mum. My daughter is my little miracle!

“When it came to choosing my sperm donor, I knew what characteristics were important to me. As a mixed-race woman with both Caribbean and English heritage, I wanted to be using a sperm donor with a similar background as myself. My culture is really important to me and I wanted to be able to share that with my child, so finding a donor who has the same heritage as myself was a non-negotiable.

I was aware that there was a shortage of Black and mixed-race donors, so I wasn’t surprised when I didn’t immediately find a donor who ticked all of my boxes. I was determined that I would find the right donor for me, and kept on looking until one day when I visited the London Sperm Bank website – there they were! A donor with both English and Caribbean heritage.

Automatically I felt drawn to the donor, and the more I read about them the more I was sure they were the right choice for me. I wouldn’t particularly describe myself as a creative person, but when I read that the donor was creative and outgoing, it seemed like the perfect match. I felt like the stars had aligned, and I knew that if I was going to be using a sperm donor, I was going to choose them.

article image
Lindsay, Lexi, and Dr Booker

I’m so glad that I pursued the option of becoming a single mother by choice. The journey can be difficult at times, but when you think about what you might achieve at the end of it, it’s so worth it. My daughter is my little miracle!

That’s also why it was so important for me to come back to London Women’s Clinic and visit Dr Booker again, with my daughter Lexi. He was over the moon to see us, and it was amazing to be able to visit the clinic and update him on how we were doing.

Becoming a mother is the best thing I have ever done, and I’m so grateful for the support I received from the London Women’s Clinic team, my family, and my friends.”

 

To find more about the London Women’s Clinic events available for single women, check out our range of open days here, or our treatments on offer for single women on their fertility journey here.

Related articles